Awkwardness

So let me give you a little bit more background on the poetry patron I went out with. Like I said yesterday, he comes to the poetry open mike night and reads. English in not his native tongue, so he asked me to help him with spelling and grammar, so I said sure. In between emailing me poems, he would also ask me to dinner or see if had any plans for the weekend. Since I always took my time answering these, he point blank asked me if I was interested in him as he was in me. I answered "No".

I went out with him because 1) he asked; 2) I haven't gone out in a long time and thought it would be fun; and 3) I've been very busy and need time away from work/home/church/gym.

All first dates have a bit of awkwardness, but the drive home was the worst. The conversation went something like this:

boy: Do you ever get lonely?

me: Yes, but not as much as I used to.

boy: So do I. I want a relationship with someone. Someone to holds with. Aren't you looking for a relationship?

me: (in my head, yes, but not with you.) Yes, but right now I'm just want to have fun.

long pause

boy: I know you don't want a serious relationship with me, but could we try to have one? You don't have to introduce me as your boyfriend or anything.

me: (in my head, what?) Look, I'm can be your friend. We can go do things together, like dinner or movies or bowling or whatever.

another long pause

boy: I get so lonely. I really think we should have a relationship.

me: I have a group of friends that get together once a week, usually on Mondays. You'd be welcome to join us.

silence

The really awkward part was that every time he started talking about being in a relationship, he would slow down to 50 mph, on the freeway.